13 mayo 2019

The eternal statue

I was late for work, so I got up as fast as I could and took to the street. Crossing to catch the tram, I was paralyzed, as if I had been stuck with a steel bar through the crown that kept me stuck to the asphalt. I couldn't take a single step. My brain sent orders to my muscles, but they didn't fucking listen. There I was, stuck in the road, unable to move.
A lady came up to me and asked me what was wrong with me, that it was dangerous to stay in the middle of the road. I can't move, I wanted to answer her, but I couldn't articulate a word. 
Soon a municipal police officer arrived and told me that I could not stay on the road. I looked at him and made a gesture of impossibility. He grabbed me by the right arm and tried to move me, but could not. He took a run and hit me like I was a quarterback who was willing to do a touchdown. However, he hit me and bounced as if he had hit a reinforced concrete block. From the ground he looked at me in awe, not quite understanding what was going on in that situation. He got up slowly, went to the patrol car and came back with five cones. He counted five steps, as if he were a football referee, in the opposite direction to the direction of traffic and put the first cone. Then he returned to my position and did the same until he placed the five cones in front of me, forming a barrier so that the cars wouldn't run over me.
However, when I was on the phone to the central, a car that came with excessive speed did not brake in time, took all the cones in front. I saw it coming and I thought it didn't count. The car rammed into me. I felt a slight tingling, as I watched as his driver shot out and fell twenty-five metres further and the car was left totally sinister. 
The policeman didn't know where to go, without understanding what was going on, he approached me and asked me if I was all right. I shook my head in the affirmative, raised my shoulders, pursed my lips, to tell him that for me too it was incomprehensible what was happening.
Ten minutes later they had cut off the lane in which I was petrified. They removed the junk into which the car was converted, the health services arrived to attend to the driver who had crashed into me and who was taken to the hospital in one of the ambulances. The toilets did all sorts of tests to check on me and the result was that I was in perfect condition.
Then came the city council technicians who, together with the firemen, tried with all their technical means to move me, but it was impossible. So, when the afternoon began to fall, they told me that they were going to break the asphalt in order to get me out of there. They put me in a waterproof suit over my head, put on a helmet and glasses and started the work.
After an hour and a half they managed to break the asphalt in order to get me off the road, but they could not. Five firefighters wanted to move me, but it was impossible, they even tried with a crane, but the attempt was unsuccessful. So they gave up.
There I spent that first night and in the morning they tried again, this time, digging a hole of more than eight meters, but they couldn't move me from the place either. The toilets asked me if I was hungry or if I had some kind of physiological need. I said no, I was fine.
After a month of useless work and studies, the mayor came to talk to me and told me that there was no way to get me out of there, that he had decided to build a square on the spot and that I would be in the center, that the institution would keep me in perfect condition.
With time I became a first-rate tourist attraction, which everyone wanted to visit and many tried to move me, there were even large bets, but no one managed to move me even a millimeter. There were also vandals who tried their best, but each and every one failed without remedy.
Many years passed, a century perhaps, I saw a nuclear war that almost killed life on earth and wiped out most of humanity, which almost disappeared from the face of the earth. 
One day, almost at dawn, a strange being of humanoid form approached me, smiled at me and said to me without articulating a word:
"Tour time has come."
I didn't understand why he was telling me that. He touched me and explained to me the reasons why they had turned me into a living statue. Then I understood.
Soon I felt the blood circulating through my body again and that I could move. I took a step and fell, but I rose like an inexperienced fawn that had just been born. I looked at the humanoid and smiled again. Then he said to me:
"Now you have the mission of transforming the world you know and you have all eternity."